Understanding The Hero’s Journey

I’m not a very good person.

Don’t get me wrong. I think I’m fairly nice, and do my best to be kind, dutiful and loyal to my friends. People seem to like me well enough, but I struggle with making and keeping friends for the long haul. They tend to come and go through the seasons of my life, and I’m starting to think I’m the reason why.

There is goodness inside me. I do good things, I know I’m not evil. And yes, I recognize my human frailties, foibles, and the fact that we all make mistakes. That’s not to what I’m referring right now.

What I mean is that heroes are good people. They do the right thing even when it’s hard. They stand up for injustice – even when it means being ridiculed by the populace for being outside the norm. When they really want to quit, they jump back in the fray. Heroes don’t hesitate, they take action. They sacrifice themselves to the good of the whole. They throw themselves in front of the train to save the passengers from a derailment, even if it means losing their own life.

I am not that kind of good. I sacrifice when it’s necessary. I give until just before it hurts. I negotiate away my pain, and dodge many of the bullets Superman would take on the chest.

But then again, I’m not made of steel.

My apologies for the crudely edited video. As I searched for the train scene from Spiderman 2, I stumbled on Aunt May’s monologue about a “hero in all of us”. It reminded me of someone.

A couple of seasons ago, I met a man with an incredible mission: he teaches kids about everyday heroism, and how to rise above and be an everyday hero. Of course, I’m incredibly generalizing the work that Matt Langdon is all about, but you get the idea.

During lunch, I told him he had a powerful message for adults, not just kids. I guess he finally agreed, because he’s working on a new blog, The Hero Handbook. I don’t make a dime for telling you about this guy, and I wouldn’t want to. He’s creating heroes, one kid at a time. The world needs more heroes and more guys like Matt.

When I found his new blog, I was reminded of the teleclass we did together where he shared “The Hero’s Journey“. Matt’s easy-to-digest, 5-point journey portrays the approximate path every hero takes on their way to becoming a true hero. For me, it was a melancholy reminder of our first encounter, and my own personal journey in the last 18 months.

See, if I’m really going to do this “super hero” thing, Matt says the next step – after my Mundane World, and The Call to Adventure, is what he calls “Crossing the threshold.” In Matt’s own words:

“Before the hero can leave the old world behind they have to cross the threshold.  There can be a number of added features at this step, but for now it is simply the act of stepping into the new world.  It’s Harry’s platform nine and three quarters, it’s Luke’s Mos Eisley, and it’s Alice’s rabbit hole.”

Platform 9 3/4 photo courtesy KingsCrossStation.com

Indeed.

I remember watching Harry stare at the wall leading to the platform, trying to figure it out. I remember a later episode when Harry missed the train and crashed into that wall.

I’m not too keen on the crashing part. But in order to break through, you have to risk smashing into the wall.

What if the hero never crosses over?

Crossing that threshold takes a certain amount of moxie, and recent life events have caused me to scrutinize whether I really am as courageous as some people think me to be. It’s easy to take the first step toward the threshold – maybe even step into the doorway. But to fully cross over, not look back, and “burn the ships” as my coach, Sarah Robinson, would say?

Or what if we all took a cue from Peter Parker and just quit? We cross the threshold, decide it’s too much like work, and want to go back to the way things were? Peter ultimately decided the only choice was to go all in, stop the train, and give up everything…

…because he was the only one who could.

But before we cross the threshold, our life is still our own. Our training, our identity, isn’t complete, we’ve only sampled the possibility of the other side. When Harry got the invitation to Hogwarts, what if he’d stayed with the Dursley’s?

Now I know, the Dursley’s are about as pleasant as a root canal, and maybe that’s the point. Maybe the pain of staying where you are is supposed to be far worse than stepping across the threshold when you’ve got hero potential. When you have nothing to lose and everything to gain, it makes stepping across the threshold that much easier.

How many of us with hero potential never cross the threshold because there’s too much at stake? How many heroes have we missed out on because they had too many commitments – bills, family, friends, activities, etc – that made life too comfortable to cross the threshold?

Can you imagine Clark Kent saying “Gee, this super speed thing is great for winning track meets and cleaning the house in a jiffy!” whilst the train speeds headlong into the ocean?

Or what if Bruce Wayne said “Alfred, we could mass-produce the bat-mobile and make a killing in the auto industry! Take THAT General Motors!”

How about if Wonder Woman said “Honey, can we just stay home on the couch and cuddle today? I know the world is in despair, but I need some me time!”?

My mind boggles.

The reason they are heroes is because they make the hard choice. They give up a piece of who they are in this moment for the greater thing they are becoming. Even Harry has to die to save his friends (and himself) from Voldemort.

I’m reminded of Indiana Jones and his leap of faith in The Last Crusade: save yourself and live a life of relative ease, or risk losing your life for the greater good.

In the movies, there’s a happy Hollywood ending waiting. But in real life?

According to Matt, after I cross over, the “path of trials” is where the real work begins.

*shivver*

I don’t mean to be indecisive or melodramatic (well, maybe a little).  I honestly didn’t realize I was pussyfootin’ around so much. I’ve been busy, you know. I’ve had LOTS of ‘stuff’ to do. I stay busy. Chronically.

My reality, however, is that my busy-ness has kept me from crossing the threshold.

My best friends for this season of my life basically put it to me thus: “do it or don’t do it, but either way, get on with it.”  Their words were a little more blunt, but you get the idea.

I’m still not entirely sure what the entire threshold looks like for me. I may never really know. But this week, I’m stepping through. By my math, it’ll take me the next 60 days to complete the crossing over, as the final embers of my ships cool to ashes and waft on the sea breeze.

Ironically, that’s also my birthday.

At nearly 36, the prospect of making this leap terrifies me. Seriously.

Hopefully, I’ll be a better friend, mom, spouse, business owner, human being when I make it to the other side.

Here goes everything…